I'm gonna be annoying and update twice in one night

[robinsnest]

the music fills my room, it wraps around my shoulders and slowly settles over my hair. my eyes burn. I don't know why I dug this cd out, i simply found it while flipping through my cd case. "all i can think of is how i have you no more, but i know somewhere your shining on me, maybe not in person but in my heart you'll be free" how long ago that seems. his voice. god I loved his voice. you know i think at one point i was really in love with tom. I think I loved his music, I loved his thoughts. "coconut flavored rum..." god why did those days have to go so fast, and why do I still cry at the memory. THey were so painfully beautiful, and so beautifully painful. I hated him even as I loved him. I wish so much we could have stayed friends. I think I look for him still in other people. I look for that boy lost within the man, I look for the music within the quiet eyes. I look for the laugh that starts deep within the body before it spreads to the face and the lips. I miss them. all three of them. Josh, Tom, Brian, I really miss you and I so wish we hadn't lost touch. I hope everything is wonderful in your lives and that something is taking care of you the way it has taken care of me.