escape to indonesia

you know how sometimes you lookforward to something for a week and when it finally gets here it never lives up to it? well this weekend was the total opposite. I was looking forward to Matt's arrival but I had no idea I'd have so much fun or feel that pang of saddness when he left.

When he first got here I thought he hadn't changed at all and that thrilled me. I had secretly feared he'd have changed tons and I wouldn't know the person who was visiting. but slowly I realized he had changed a lot. but the changes were subtle and wonderful. When i first met matt i confess i was in really rough shape. and in retrospect how could i expect a high school freshman to help me, we were both still learning to be people forget about how to help someone through that kinda thing. but at the time I was always wishing and imagining he'd be more mature, and he'd say sweet things etc. Matt has grown into that image. he's much more mature (four years has a weird way of doing that) and he's taller than me now! (again i blame the time diffrence) and he can talk to you. He was willing to sit and pillow talk with me, almost open up. I realized I didn't actually know his eye color!!! how could i have dated this boy and never once spent enough time looking him in the eyes to realize they were such a pure blue? for the first time i saw some of who I think he really is. i think it was worth the wa

escape to indonesia

you know how sometimes you lookforward to something for a week and when it finally gets here it never lives up to it? well this weekend was the total opposite. I was looking forward to Matt's arrival but I had no idea I'd have so much fun or feel that pang of saddness when he left.

When he first got here I thought he hadn't changed at all and that thrilled me. I had secretly feared he'd have changed tons and I wouldn't know the person who was visiting. but slowly I realized he had changed a lot. but the changes were subtle and wonderful. When i first met matt i confess i was in really rough shape. and in retrospect how could i expect a high school freshman to help me, we were both still learning to be people forget about how to help someone through that kinda thing. but at the time I was always wishing and imagining he'd be more mature, and he'd say sweet things etc. Matt has grown into that image. he's much more mature (four years has a weird way of doing that) and he's taller than me now! (again i blame the time diffrence) and he can talk to you. He was willing to sit and pillow talk with me, almost open up. I realized I didn't actually know his eye color!!! how could i have dated this boy and never once spent enough time looking him in the eyes to realize they were such a pure blue? for the first time i saw some of who I think he really is. i think it was worth the wa