robinsnest | I'm struggling very hard with the urge to cut myself

I spent most of my morning vomitting up everything that was and wasn't in my system, I feel week, dizzy and all around gross.

the worst part was I couldn't make my head focus on doing anything so I'm experiencing a major case of feeling gross.

Mike's being distant and I've sat here so long I'm convinced he's done with me, and I stupidly let myself fall head over heels for someone who is going to break up with me because I'm fucked up, I'm always sick, I'm boring I don't even know why.

I just want to feel pain other than in my stomach and my head. but I'm trying so very hard to be strong right now. very very hard.